HAPPY 15TH BIRTHDAY SITI NUR NATHASHA! :)

AH, english paper just ended and now i'm in the school library.
Accompany-ing Afee to do some of her own "things". hehe.
So shall take this opportunity to blog! and check mails. :)

English paper wasn't that bad.
Paper 2 passage2 erm, sucks? yeah, big time!
And Miss Lee, I'm embarrassed okay!

OKAY YESTERDAY WAS SUPER DUPER HAPPENING OKAY!

well, Yesterday was supposed to be the day where Arif and I study together.
AS PLANNED. But He didn't turn up. :( I waited in my class since school ended ytd.
I saw him having fun in his class while I cried twice in my class. First time, Naddy came
and consoled me. Then she left around 4 plus. Thats when I felt super lonely and felt
that everyone abandoned me. SERIOUS. Afee, Naddy, Arif, and my other friends.
I cried. I was so sad, yet no one knows. No one bothered to find out.

Around 5, after some sec2's stopped by and saw me crying.
Thanks for the coax ehh people :)
Saw Arif left his class with his friends.
OKAY, i was let down. I cried home and cried and cried and cried.
Cheated; I thought I was.

He text me twice and I didnt reply.
well, I did lah at night.
Arif, I won't slap, kill, kick you though you asked me to.
I forgive you lah okay?

Thanks for coming down to my block and treat me ice cream !:)
Though I asked for Mc flurry treat some other days, You on your own
accord came to my place. Melts lah! Really, I can't stop smiling! hehes.
People people, you don't know how happy I am okayy. veryyyyyyyyyyyy.

Yeap.
So, crying for long hours was worth it huh? HAHAH.

Alrighto.
Have to turn off, Only got half and hour. :)
And wanna have my mcflurry! yeayness.
Good day!

1YEAR 26 DAYS. LOVELOVE.

So I shall place myself in the TOP10 in class and CLICK FIVE HERE I COME.

weinng, as if! But that is what my sister told me!

Irah: Kakak, I really wanna go click five lah, kyle patrick you know!
Kakak: then you try to get top 10 and ask mama to buy you the tickets.
Irah: ermm, wadda fish? As if mama wanna buy me and let me go.

Oh mannn, I wanna strike out at least that on my wishlist!
I never thought it would come. KYLE PATRICK LAHH SEH!

I Spring cleaned my room right after I came back from Madrasah
and shittaz, I'm having flu now and my nose won't stop running. waddafish?
You get what I mean righhht. The room is so much cleaner now and I'm
happy with it :) but what I'm afraid now is that, once my sister come back
from her KL trip, the room will be back to square one and I'll be scolding her
and she's gonna scold me back. nevermind.

Tmr's Monday which means double periods all the way except for the first,
which is Malay. I tell you, it's boring for certain lesson where you have to sit
and just listen to the teacher teachings. Really, not that I'm showing no respect
but I do fall asleep at certain times. But hey, I do try hard to stay awake okay.

Mid year starts this week. Only for English Language.
Yess, Let's die alright. I slacked. Really, I want the OLD IRAH BACKK.

Shittaz, Uniform not ironed.

SEE, i'm not ready for school.
I need a new pair of school shoes and mom kept on delaying.
I need a haircut cause my hair is seriously out of shape and shit,
it's reaallyyyy irritating man.. enough.

Not feeling well people so, becareful of what you wanna say to me.
I may not be in the mood to joke or whatever shit it is.

SCRAM

Definitely, maybe; a movie to remember
Definitely, maybe; a day never to come across my life ever again.

I suppose some of the sec4's know why righht.
To shorten the story, I lied and got scolded. The reason why I made myself
free on that day was to have a fun day with Mr A but hell, i gain nth.
The guys ditched us and I have to feel guilty for the feel 3 days.
Nevermind. Things are fine now, Right?.

SO hey!
Some of you guys do enjoy reading my entries.
Well, didn't know that till I read those tags :) and some friends
from school do bug me to update! seesh. ALRIGHT THEN.

Really really really sorry for the lack of updates.
You know, lappy is gone for good and I can't even check my mails!
And I have no idea when we're getting another lappy. =.=

Alright.
School have been awesome this year.
I really do enjoy going to school and learn. REALLY.
How weird; Arif said I'm the first who said Schooling is fun.
It is fun alright! Like I told him. imagine life where you don't need
to study and wake up early to go to school. BAD.
- You won't be discipline cause you don't need to wake up early to go to school.
- You won't have friends like you have it now. RIGHT.
- You won't have any knowledge. errr?

ALOT LAH. think about it.
SCHOOLING IS FUN.

Righht.
I flunked most of my maths test after getting 3rd in class.
Complesant I am. I'm sorry for not trying my best now.
WHERE DID THE SMART IRAH? Dani boy said. Oh yes, where?
Idk. Mid year is otw and I feel really really stupid. I used to teach
my Bestie Afee and right now, it's the other way round. scaaryyy.

YEAP; hopefully my "tutor" is gonna tutor me well.
Though he's taking his N level this year. :) shall learn together.

Heccckk, what am I doing on this laptop when I'm suppose to
be studying for my Midyear? Bad bad Irah. :)

Yesterday was a great day for me :)
School started out fine. Was early for school and as I entered the school,
there's this strange feeling creeps into me. I wonder why the school is
super quiet. Not much noise from the Parade Square like usual. As I reached
the Parade Square after putting my bags in the class, I realised that the lowersec
are at home doing E-learning. E-learning; where they stay at home and do their
school works via the school Portal. COOL? Had mine lastyear.

So yeahs, the surroundings yesterday is much more "matured".
Only the right side of the parade square are filled up by the uppersec.
There's only one recess and the tables and floor in the canteen are clean
unlike usual where there will be chicken bones and bits of rice all over the floor.
:) NO offence. And the school was pretty quiet that day.

Thursday and Friday was great! I really do look forward
for those days to come cause, on thursday, there'll be 4 periods
of art and on friday, 3 periods of art. And art lessons only starts
after recess and that makes the day pass real fast. Really. But for this
week, 7 periods of art;WASTED. Miss Nana didn't come due to some
Family Problems. Suprisingly, the class werent noisy like we were on
other relief classes. Except for yesterday. 3N2 3N1 & 3E4 students changed
classes. Some of the N1's came over to 3N2 classroom while some of N2's went
over to N1 & E4. And since there's only sec3,4&5 in the school, I can say that
this 3 classes are the most chaotic for that day. All other class's corridor are so
quiet and ours, full of people running around! It is fun though.

I only went over to E4 at the last period.
First 2 periods were for my maths homework.
So, I sat down and do my homework with the tunes from my Hp.

So, bell rang and Afee and I screamed and walked out of 3E4 like
as if it's the end of our secondary life. As if exams are over when it
is about to start. Really. Chaotic. So, fee left for Pizza Hut while
I have nothing to do until Miss lee came to class for remedial.
I joined in and laugh laugh laugh. Everything ended around 1.20pm
and left school around 2pm and headed to Zizie's place and waited for
her to change. Alyssha and I sat at the RC eating and starring at those
primary school kids who are all super irritating. Finally she came down
and we headed to causeway. FINALLY, alyssha and I had our Mcflurryyy!
That's our objective to come to causeway. Just to get ourselves mcflurry.

We had no where to go and none of our friends are free.
So we walked around and headed to the Library and waited for
Syafiqah to come over. And ALyssha's brother. Sat there until 5 plus.
Went down and gosh, bought myself another mcflurryyyy!! :)
Walked home with Syafiqah.

Had Pizza for dinner yesterday night.
Asked cousin Dani and Baby Apin to come over.
Was msging Arif that night :) lovelove.
He fell asleep and didn't reply my msg. So, i went to bed too.
And this morning at 6.45am, he text me :)
Pity him, had to wake up early to attend this seminar
at Science Center and stuff. While me, enjoying my sleep!

Oh man, I need a new school shoe.
Cursed that human with no balls who stole my Everlast school shoe!

Band; Clarinet section is now under my care.
I'm scared, I'm worried, I'm afraid. Seriously.
We read thru our SYF piece and I tell you, it looks super dificult
and it sounded difficult. I really really hope every soul in my section
could try their best to help me lead. I'm not good I know, but I really
do hope we all can learn together. Spot my mistakes and we'll learn together.

AFRAID. shall take this as a challenge for me.

AH SHIT, TMR MADRASAH. AKUUU BENCIIII

Let's get emotional people..

I know I haven't been updating this page for like so long and I don't think
there's anyone who bothers and want me to update. Well, I have time now so why not
update for the benefit of no one. okay crappp.

Alot of things had happened and I've been thankful to God all this while.
Even for the hard times I faced, after all those shits, something good happened.
Everyday, I waited for a miracle to happen which at times it didn't and I'm
dissapointed.

Today it's the 4th of March 2008.
Which marks the 1year and 5 days of waiting; and counting.
Some told me to give it a break. Some told me I'm too obssessed.
Some told me they have not met someone so obssessed with a guy
this much like I do. Some said I'm crazy. Some said I'm wasting time.
Some said I'm a freak who seems to be wanting attention and not receiving
any. Some said I'm dumb for waiting this long. More people said more things
but all I know, I'm doing the right thing. Call me everything you want to, I'm
taking it with my fullest pleasure. Let it be hard, I'm okay with it.
Like I said, anything for this love I wanted. <3

Ofcourse some things which are darn funny happened between me and Arif.
Arif, Naddy and Afee knows and saw what happened and i assure you, it is funny.
Haha. I went pale and I can't breathe cause he gave me the biggest shock of my life.
Well, he gave him one for himself too. haha. lovelove.

There's a time when he is in the toilet and there's the cleaner outside.
I told the cleaner to off the lights, she did and arif is inside doing his things
in the dark. haha. kesian.

But behind those happy times, alot of things strikes.
I cried every night right before I go to sleep, that explains why
I can't wake up in the morning. I had inner conflicts with myself.
Asking questions which I can't answer. I wonder why is he doing this to me.
I mean, what am I lack of? There's alot of things I asked myself and I find
it depressing. I cried and cried and cried. I swear, I've never felt the heartache
I feel now in my whole entire life. Some people just say that they are having
a heartache. Why? broke up with Bf or whatever shit it is.

Honestly, I didn't know how it felt like though I kept on saying " I totally know how you feel".
I don't. But right now, I'm feeling all those things. He is the cure to this heartache but
why isn't he healing it? Where is he when I need him most? I may sound as if he's my
Bf but no, he is just a stranger i suppose. I mean, why can't we be friends? Like normal
friends. It's been 1 year and it's a long jouney arif, but we haven't spoke a word to
each other. Except for the "WHOOOA" you shouted that time about that incident
and the "Sorry ehh :) " in your class you said to me. I mean, those are just normal
though I went over the moon upon hearing that.

There's something that you might wanna give me.
You agreed to someone but where? Wheres you're promise?
It's okay. All i need to see is sincerity.

Many of my friends told me that your type of a guy is that the girl have to make
the first move. But I kept quiet cause I'm afraid. I have to make the right choice.
I don't want to make a small wrong step and there goes everything. Right now, this
point of time, I really wanna know who am I to you.

A school mate, a friend, a good friend, a bestfriend, a special friend, or a special someone
in your life. Cause I know who you are to me a year ago. You're not those mentioned above.
You're someone who I want in my life. You're needed. I felt more alive with you around.
I mean, just seeing you or even having a glance makes my day. I swear, asked around.
That's why I'm called a freak. But it's true. If just having a glance keeps me smiling troughout
the day, what more if we were to sit in the same classroom ( which alrd happened). What more
if we talk in school. I swear, you are the one I need. True.

I don't mind spending alot of cash on my prepaid just to keep in contact with you.

I know you saw your picture as my screensaver on my cell.
I know you touched my cell and listen to the songs in it.
I know you did something to my cell but I don't know what.
I know you touched my sweet which was in my bag but scared to
take it as you don't wanna be accused of stealing sweets =.=

Arif, I know it all.
I know you well enough to be more than friends.
I know studies is your top priority and yes, I support & agree.
but could you bare to see me in this state whereby I'm loosing
focus in everything I do just because of this? No worries, you're not
making my life worst but it would be great if you were to make me happy.

I rushed to school just to bump into you, do you even know that?
I will go moody if I didn't bump into you. And yes, I pity my friends
especially the guys cause I'll let my angers and whatever shit it is out
to them and I'll be screaming and shoot nasty words to them. I know I'm bad
but I can't control myself. This things are taking over my life. What kind of life
you have as a 14 year old? What do you know? Many might ask. Hey, it's my feelings.
So, age doesn't matter. What matters, people do not interfere others affair.

There's a couple of friends of mine are making me sick.
There's no need for you to support him during his 2.4.
He don't need you both to cheer for him okay. WHY HIM OF ALL PEOPLE
PREPPY B******? ARGH.

And to that sec2 girl, please choose either 1.
Though you like Guy 2 more than Guy1 (arif),
just don't make me do any harm to you alright.
really, your sight makes me wanna puke, let me repeat,
your sight makes me wanna puke. grrrr.

I need you.
OH CRAPPPP.

------------------------------------------------------------------

Studies,
I screwed up on both maths test ; Geometry & Trigo.
Where's the full marks Irah? Where's the Irah where people do actually
looked up for? Where's the hardworking Irah? I guess I'm only doing well
for the first part of the year. Mid year onwards, I've changed.
HELP ME ANYONE?

Really, I'm waiting for a miracle to happen.